Thank you, Michelle. The importance of silence, spirit, and synchronicity resonates with me — it is hard to have one without the other! Stopping the chatter in our brains makes us aware and truly alive. Love the images of the birds. I can see them fly, one with a wedge tail and one with a fan!
Another week that was a mixed bag for me, in terms of the Morning Pages and tasks. I did make sure I did the artist’s date — picking up an adult coloring book and some colored magic markers that had been sitting amongst stuff in my office for many years. I am feeling some resistance and I am not quite sure what is going on. Need to write about it!!!
My week was abundant with synchronicities and creative work (both creating and organizing the business end, web presence updates etc.)
I did morning pages about four days this week and today I was running errands with my family so I’ve yet to do them. It took me all day to complete them a few times, and even when I made it so that I could concentrate and get it out of the way more quickly, it still took me several hours and was like pulling teeth. But I recognize that that’s the faucet beginning to sputter as the old water gets pushed through that had been sitting in the line. I got a few poems, some decent, some too rough, and ideas for 3 professional presentations at psychology conferences (as an artist/survivor; I’m not a therapist.)
Also, I realized that my use of a particular substance to help myself relax interferes with my cognitive abilities and my ability to write and think clearly way more than I usually acknowledge to myself when I’m not trying to write morning pages every day. So I’m considering options to get support for myself to adjust that if needed but meanwhile, I’ve decided to go back to limiting myself so that I’m only doing a bit of indulging at night when I’m relaxing after I get a days worth of functioning in. It was a good self-check-in and reality call about the priorities of my goals versus my comfort regarding cannabis. As my mother says (quoting a Sesame Street sketch), “You’ve got to put down the ducky if you want to play rock ‘n’ roll.” (In the sketch, Ernie is trying to play the saxophone 🎷 with the muppet band but discovers he can’t play while he’s holding his favorite rubber ducky.)
I was nursing a mild but annoying head cold all week and mostly had to stay indoors and avoid people. My Artist date was making myself an almond butter + banana + ginger smoothie in my Vitamix, which is like a rocket ship for my kitchen. It always sounds like an airplane taking off and I think it shakes my entire apartment building so my neighbors must know when I use it several times a week. It tasted great and was healthy and I used a little honey to sweeten it and no sugar and I’m really proud of myself.
When useful, I imagine putting the head of my enemies inside the Vitamix and blending it to an angry froth, and then pouring it down a deep fiery black hole with lava way down in there, that goes all the way to the center of the planet, which will recycle the souls of my enemies. It was a sacrifice to buy that on my budget after covid and it took me a while to pay it off, but I have to say it’s been worth it at least for the psychological value, if not the health benefits.
Today, I had the privilege of being given a tour of my brother-in-law‘s fig forest in Galt. He probably has 20-40 trees out there, each one labeled in its own pot, some of them grafted together into Frankenstein fig trees that will grow several varieties of the fruit at once.
My niece gave me a peach that she had grown on one of her trees in the front yard, and when I got home, I savored it. Eating it reminded me of the best times with my family in the 70s and 80s going to picnics and farms where we would pick up fruit and vegetables fresh and save them when we got them home and turned them into whatever dishes or canned items we had planned. I didn’t plan to get a tour today; it wasn’t like the kind of artist state that I usually get where I take myself somewhere or do something or partake of something from home. But it was such a beautiful experience and I realized after I got home that I had taken over 100 pictures with my phone camera and they’re just gonna inspire me all season and for years to come because it was so rich and beautiful to see all this loving labor and cultivation that my brother and his family puts into their suburban orchard & garden.
My mom got the first two figs of the season and I took a video of her harvesting them.
Since I sometimes have to take space from my family when things are challenging, I connect more deeply with them when we’re able to find common ground and respect each other‘s boundaries appropriately and each other’s history, even if we don’t agree on that history. I really love my family despite all of our dysfunctions. I really do believe that our love is ultimately bigger than our dysfunctions, but I know that for my own well-being I have to keep healthy boundaries in order to keep my own mental health in order and functioning well.
The synchronicity thing that happened this week was so fun! I called my veterinarian to make an appointment for my younger old cat, and after doing so, and discussing my other cat’s problem with his extra long nails, which have been catching on the carpet, every time he walks around at night like little Velcro patches, the woman on the phone offered to help me on the side by coming over to my house to trim my cat’s nails. It turns out that this woman is my son‘s roommate’s best friend and so not only is she willing to come over to my house after her work and work on my cats nails, but we can bring my son over and he can help us with the cat because it’s his cat and it is a huge gigantic creature with extra thumbs because he’s a Hemmingway polydactyl meaning he has extra little fingers and his paws look like little white mittens with his orange and white fur.
The woman had told me her name and I kind of mumbled. Oh, you don’t happen to know a girl named R— do you? It’s a longshot. And she said the gal‘s last name and I was shocked and delighted, and we were both shocked and delighted to discover that we had met in person and that she was friends with my son and his girlfriend and their whole little tribe. So completely delightful and benevolent of the universe to bring us together at a time when the news in the world is so hard to watch and there’s so much suffering and corruption and confusion going on. This is not the first time that politicians have broken the rules and overreached and I’m sure it will not be the last in America or anywhere in the world but I know that we will persevere and it’s moments like these that just give me that glimpse into something way bigger.
I highly recommend watching the Beyoncé video album on Apple TV+ called Black is King that’s a retelling of the African myth The Lion King. The first song she performs in this high art series of videos, she sings to her child: “You’re part of some way bigger.” I’m getting choked up as I write this because I need to be reminded that every day and the synchronicity is undeniable that I experience when I’m present enough in my own life to fill up six pages with long hand writing every day and think about how to nurture my own creativity.
That’s my check in! No tasks yet, I’ll try to explore those next week as I catch up on the reading, too.
Forgive me if I have not been able to get to everyone’s comments to respond meaningfully. I do eventually read them and catch up and try to at least heart them and offer a little feedback if possible, time permitting.
Thank you, Michelle! And thanks to Julia Cameron, what a fire is in that woman’s soul. Truly inspired leaders! And thank you to my fellow participants. We are allowing ourselves to get intimate with our muses through artists way so it makes sense it’s going to bring up strong feelings even to write the junk of to-do lists and done-lists.
a fig forest! I've never even thought about such a thing. sounds lovely. I love how intimate you are with your muses, and the way you share them with us. thank you!!! see you next week :)
"Some call [synchronicity] magical thinking. But I think it’s the deeper pattern surfacing, the one we’re woven into, whether we believe in it or not." YES!
And also yes, I crave synchronicity because I crave conversation with the world. Thank you for a powerful post.
* * *
Completed 6/7 days of morning pages. Today's included some particularly powerful insights.
This week my plan for an Artist Date was solo bowling (my younger self really loves bowling!). But then I was feeling tired, and grouchy, and like, "Isn't that awkward to solo bowl?" At the precise moment I was trying to talk myself out of it, Erin texted and asked how it went! Lol!
That's when I heard my inner-child/artist tell me the reason we are tired and grouchy is because we have not gone on our Artist's Date! All we do is work, work, work. So, I pivoted in that moment, and went solo bowling.
Just like my inner-artist said it would, it lightened my energy!
I think what is starting to truly shift for me is that I am asking myself more and more throughout the day, especially when I am feeling tired or stuck: "What do you need right now to play, or to lift the mood, or to go out and engage joyfully with the world?"
Generating joy and play is becoming a long-desired creative/spiritual daily practice for me. Woot.
I am sooooooooooooooo PROUD OF YOU!!!! Solo bowling! You're my hero. And I love this question: "What do you need right now to play, or to lift the mood, or to go out and engage joyfully with the world?"
What a powrful way to greet yourself and practice the art of creative and spiritual being.
Synchronicities: the theme of the river showing up in conversations during this past week. My husband Ben and I traveled to visit my friend who lives in Tennessee, right across the street from Great Smoky Mountain National Park. And we took a hike along the Little River. The entire time I was thinking, "I'm going to write about this," and I knew I would.
Then, when I returned home and video chatted with a Substack friend, she described my creative flow like a river--feral, uncertain, uncontrolled. "You're learning to let go," she said. "You're learning to move with the river."
So that's been my form of a divine nudge, and I'll take it.
I just want to say, once again, that your writing is gorgeous, Michelle. One of the best on here.
Wow! Today's post was magical, resonant, and synchronous. Upon finishing reading, Spotify queued up "My Heroes have always been Cowboys' by Willie Nelson which is one of my favorite songs of his. Too me it is a perfect blend of wanderlust, nostalgia, sadness, and wistfulness: "Sadly, in search of, and one step in back of themselves and their slow-movin' dreams"
And your words themselves were a powerful does of synchronicity for me this morning:
"Synchronicity isn’t proof, it’s permission. To soften. To open. To remember that not everything that matters can be measured.
Animism teaches that the world is alive with spirit. The raven’s gaze. The stream answering a question I haven’t asked. Science calls this projection, but science, too, is a form of storytelling. And the best science leaves room for awe."
Professionally, I am a data scientist whose role is to quantify, measure, and objectively evaluate, but I will argue (sometimes passionately) that data does not win the debates, but stories and storytelling are how you convince people. Data is the spice that flavors the story, but it is not the story itself. The best scientists (Einstein, Feynman, Sagan, Hawking, Tyson) understand this, and that is why they speak of science it is is with a playful sense of awe.
I love what you say here about data and storytelling. Yes. When I taught critical thinking I used to say, when trying to convince me of a policy, you can give me all the numbers in the world, but tell me the true story of one child whose life has been irretrievably altered, tell me in a way I can feel and I will listen.
Love the reference to how the data tells a story. I used to be in budgeting for a Fortune 500 corporation and I would compose a budget narrative that was a story. The numbers by themselves are not the story! Absolutely agree.
(1) Completed 7 out of 7 MP, but not always in the morning, but did better at that this week.
(2) My artists data was taking a meandering trek through a suburban semi-wild walking trail. Brought the camera and allowed my feet an intuition lead me. Found beautiful flowers, an interesting desiccated branch, birds, and then played with long exposure photography on the night time walk back: https://www.instagram.com/p/DLaLr_YRZn2/?igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==
(3) Synchronicity (see other comment)
(4) No resistance on any particular, but did not get around to (5) tasks even though that was my aspirational goal for this cohort.
Synchronicity and belonging just because we are here...I feel this deeply when I am in Nature when the human noises no longer down out the natural ones of the world we are gifted to live in. I work in the city and urban life can often drown out nature, but only if I let it. I take time to pause and listen, watch, be still, feel the sun or breeze. It reminds me that Nature is still there amidst our built environment.
Good evening AW family, I’m doing my check in a little late, but better than never. It was a hectic week and I think I missed a couple days of morning pages and some were just a morning page (singular). I’m doing my artist date right now. I’m sitting at an outdoor patio of a restaurant/pub in a strip mall. I was out running errands and decided to eat at a place I haven’t been to before. Not the ideal location, but we sometimes have to forage for what we need. There’s live music here. A duet of guitars and vocals singing Brown Eyed Girl. The sun is setting and I’m looking up at the mountains where I live and I am admiring them from a different angle. A different perspective. I’m finding beauty here with the silhouette of palm fronds against an orange sky. I found good music and good food. It is quiet in the summer evening. I found what I needed in an unlikely place.
This morning’s
synchronicity: barely 12 hours ago somebody I was with mentioned “Like mycelium threading messages below our feet.”
Wowwwww. And what an apt message.
Thank you, Michelle. The importance of silence, spirit, and synchronicity resonates with me — it is hard to have one without the other! Stopping the chatter in our brains makes us aware and truly alive. Love the images of the birds. I can see them fly, one with a wedge tail and one with a fan!
Another week that was a mixed bag for me, in terms of the Morning Pages and tasks. I did make sure I did the artist’s date — picking up an adult coloring book and some colored magic markers that had been sitting amongst stuff in my office for many years. I am feeling some resistance and I am not quite sure what is going on. Need to write about it!!!
My week was abundant with synchronicities and creative work (both creating and organizing the business end, web presence updates etc.)
I did morning pages about four days this week and today I was running errands with my family so I’ve yet to do them. It took me all day to complete them a few times, and even when I made it so that I could concentrate and get it out of the way more quickly, it still took me several hours and was like pulling teeth. But I recognize that that’s the faucet beginning to sputter as the old water gets pushed through that had been sitting in the line. I got a few poems, some decent, some too rough, and ideas for 3 professional presentations at psychology conferences (as an artist/survivor; I’m not a therapist.)
Also, I realized that my use of a particular substance to help myself relax interferes with my cognitive abilities and my ability to write and think clearly way more than I usually acknowledge to myself when I’m not trying to write morning pages every day. So I’m considering options to get support for myself to adjust that if needed but meanwhile, I’ve decided to go back to limiting myself so that I’m only doing a bit of indulging at night when I’m relaxing after I get a days worth of functioning in. It was a good self-check-in and reality call about the priorities of my goals versus my comfort regarding cannabis. As my mother says (quoting a Sesame Street sketch), “You’ve got to put down the ducky if you want to play rock ‘n’ roll.” (In the sketch, Ernie is trying to play the saxophone 🎷 with the muppet band but discovers he can’t play while he’s holding his favorite rubber ducky.)
I was nursing a mild but annoying head cold all week and mostly had to stay indoors and avoid people. My Artist date was making myself an almond butter + banana + ginger smoothie in my Vitamix, which is like a rocket ship for my kitchen. It always sounds like an airplane taking off and I think it shakes my entire apartment building so my neighbors must know when I use it several times a week. It tasted great and was healthy and I used a little honey to sweeten it and no sugar and I’m really proud of myself.
When useful, I imagine putting the head of my enemies inside the Vitamix and blending it to an angry froth, and then pouring it down a deep fiery black hole with lava way down in there, that goes all the way to the center of the planet, which will recycle the souls of my enemies. It was a sacrifice to buy that on my budget after covid and it took me a while to pay it off, but I have to say it’s been worth it at least for the psychological value, if not the health benefits.
Today, I had the privilege of being given a tour of my brother-in-law‘s fig forest in Galt. He probably has 20-40 trees out there, each one labeled in its own pot, some of them grafted together into Frankenstein fig trees that will grow several varieties of the fruit at once.
My niece gave me a peach that she had grown on one of her trees in the front yard, and when I got home, I savored it. Eating it reminded me of the best times with my family in the 70s and 80s going to picnics and farms where we would pick up fruit and vegetables fresh and save them when we got them home and turned them into whatever dishes or canned items we had planned. I didn’t plan to get a tour today; it wasn’t like the kind of artist state that I usually get where I take myself somewhere or do something or partake of something from home. But it was such a beautiful experience and I realized after I got home that I had taken over 100 pictures with my phone camera and they’re just gonna inspire me all season and for years to come because it was so rich and beautiful to see all this loving labor and cultivation that my brother and his family puts into their suburban orchard & garden.
My mom got the first two figs of the season and I took a video of her harvesting them.
Since I sometimes have to take space from my family when things are challenging, I connect more deeply with them when we’re able to find common ground and respect each other‘s boundaries appropriately and each other’s history, even if we don’t agree on that history. I really love my family despite all of our dysfunctions. I really do believe that our love is ultimately bigger than our dysfunctions, but I know that for my own well-being I have to keep healthy boundaries in order to keep my own mental health in order and functioning well.
The synchronicity thing that happened this week was so fun! I called my veterinarian to make an appointment for my younger old cat, and after doing so, and discussing my other cat’s problem with his extra long nails, which have been catching on the carpet, every time he walks around at night like little Velcro patches, the woman on the phone offered to help me on the side by coming over to my house to trim my cat’s nails. It turns out that this woman is my son‘s roommate’s best friend and so not only is she willing to come over to my house after her work and work on my cats nails, but we can bring my son over and he can help us with the cat because it’s his cat and it is a huge gigantic creature with extra thumbs because he’s a Hemmingway polydactyl meaning he has extra little fingers and his paws look like little white mittens with his orange and white fur.
The woman had told me her name and I kind of mumbled. Oh, you don’t happen to know a girl named R— do you? It’s a longshot. And she said the gal‘s last name and I was shocked and delighted, and we were both shocked and delighted to discover that we had met in person and that she was friends with my son and his girlfriend and their whole little tribe. So completely delightful and benevolent of the universe to bring us together at a time when the news in the world is so hard to watch and there’s so much suffering and corruption and confusion going on. This is not the first time that politicians have broken the rules and overreached and I’m sure it will not be the last in America or anywhere in the world but I know that we will persevere and it’s moments like these that just give me that glimpse into something way bigger.
I highly recommend watching the Beyoncé video album on Apple TV+ called Black is King that’s a retelling of the African myth The Lion King. The first song she performs in this high art series of videos, she sings to her child: “You’re part of some way bigger.” I’m getting choked up as I write this because I need to be reminded that every day and the synchronicity is undeniable that I experience when I’m present enough in my own life to fill up six pages with long hand writing every day and think about how to nurture my own creativity.
That’s my check in! No tasks yet, I’ll try to explore those next week as I catch up on the reading, too.
Forgive me if I have not been able to get to everyone’s comments to respond meaningfully. I do eventually read them and catch up and try to at least heart them and offer a little feedback if possible, time permitting.
Thank you, Michelle! And thanks to Julia Cameron, what a fire is in that woman’s soul. Truly inspired leaders! And thank you to my fellow participants. We are allowing ourselves to get intimate with our muses through artists way so it makes sense it’s going to bring up strong feelings even to write the junk of to-do lists and done-lists.
a fig forest! I've never even thought about such a thing. sounds lovely. I love how intimate you are with your muses, and the way you share them with us. thank you!!! see you next week :)
I love the image of a fig forest and peach trees — fertile ground for your artist’s work.
"Some call [synchronicity] magical thinking. But I think it’s the deeper pattern surfacing, the one we’re woven into, whether we believe in it or not." YES!
And also yes, I crave synchronicity because I crave conversation with the world. Thank you for a powerful post.
* * *
Completed 6/7 days of morning pages. Today's included some particularly powerful insights.
This week my plan for an Artist Date was solo bowling (my younger self really loves bowling!). But then I was feeling tired, and grouchy, and like, "Isn't that awkward to solo bowl?" At the precise moment I was trying to talk myself out of it, Erin texted and asked how it went! Lol!
That's when I heard my inner-child/artist tell me the reason we are tired and grouchy is because we have not gone on our Artist's Date! All we do is work, work, work. So, I pivoted in that moment, and went solo bowling.
Just like my inner-artist said it would, it lightened my energy!
I think what is starting to truly shift for me is that I am asking myself more and more throughout the day, especially when I am feeling tired or stuck: "What do you need right now to play, or to lift the mood, or to go out and engage joyfully with the world?"
Generating joy and play is becoming a long-desired creative/spiritual daily practice for me. Woot.
I am sooooooooooooooo PROUD OF YOU!!!! Solo bowling! You're my hero. And I love this question: "What do you need right now to play, or to lift the mood, or to go out and engage joyfully with the world?"
What a powrful way to greet yourself and practice the art of creative and spiritual being.
I too loved the "What do you need right now to play, or to lift the mood, or to go out and engage joyfully with the world?" That is so beautiful,
And, I think it is so awesome that you went our bowling alone especially because of the seminal book Bowling Alone. Thank you for sharing!
Hi Michelle,
Synchronicities: the theme of the river showing up in conversations during this past week. My husband Ben and I traveled to visit my friend who lives in Tennessee, right across the street from Great Smoky Mountain National Park. And we took a hike along the Little River. The entire time I was thinking, "I'm going to write about this," and I knew I would.
Then, when I returned home and video chatted with a Substack friend, she described my creative flow like a river--feral, uncertain, uncontrolled. "You're learning to let go," she said. "You're learning to move with the river."
So that's been my form of a divine nudge, and I'll take it.
I just want to say, once again, that your writing is gorgeous, Michelle. One of the best on here.
Thank you, Jeannie! And I love, love, love that you're learning to move with the river! I always look forward to reading you.
Likewise, Michelle!
You are both amazing writers!
That means so much, Tom. Thank you!
Wow! Today's post was magical, resonant, and synchronous. Upon finishing reading, Spotify queued up "My Heroes have always been Cowboys' by Willie Nelson which is one of my favorite songs of his. Too me it is a perfect blend of wanderlust, nostalgia, sadness, and wistfulness: "Sadly, in search of, and one step in back of themselves and their slow-movin' dreams"
And your words themselves were a powerful does of synchronicity for me this morning:
"Synchronicity isn’t proof, it’s permission. To soften. To open. To remember that not everything that matters can be measured.
Animism teaches that the world is alive with spirit. The raven’s gaze. The stream answering a question I haven’t asked. Science calls this projection, but science, too, is a form of storytelling. And the best science leaves room for awe."
Professionally, I am a data scientist whose role is to quantify, measure, and objectively evaluate, but I will argue (sometimes passionately) that data does not win the debates, but stories and storytelling are how you convince people. Data is the spice that flavors the story, but it is not the story itself. The best scientists (Einstein, Feynman, Sagan, Hawking, Tyson) understand this, and that is why they speak of science it is is with a playful sense of awe.
Thank you Michelle!
I love what you say here about data and storytelling. Yes. When I taught critical thinking I used to say, when trying to convince me of a policy, you can give me all the numbers in the world, but tell me the true story of one child whose life has been irretrievably altered, tell me in a way I can feel and I will listen.
Love the reference to how the data tells a story. I used to be in budgeting for a Fortune 500 corporation and I would compose a budget narrative that was a story. The numbers by themselves are not the story! Absolutely agree.
Now for my Artist Way check in:
(1) Completed 7 out of 7 MP, but not always in the morning, but did better at that this week.
(2) My artists data was taking a meandering trek through a suburban semi-wild walking trail. Brought the camera and allowed my feet an intuition lead me. Found beautiful flowers, an interesting desiccated branch, birds, and then played with long exposure photography on the night time walk back: https://www.instagram.com/p/DLaLr_YRZn2/?igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==
(3) Synchronicity (see other comment)
(4) No resistance on any particular, but did not get around to (5) tasks even though that was my aspirational goal for this cohort.
Your photos are breathtaking! What a date!
I know the tasks are hard to get to! But I recommend just trying one per week. You don't have to be an over-acheiver!
Synchronicity and belonging just because we are here...I feel this deeply when I am in Nature when the human noises no longer down out the natural ones of the world we are gifted to live in. I work in the city and urban life can often drown out nature, but only if I let it. I take time to pause and listen, watch, be still, feel the sun or breeze. It reminds me that Nature is still there amidst our built environment.
Yes. Nature is always there. We ARE nature.
Good evening AW family, I’m doing my check in a little late, but better than never. It was a hectic week and I think I missed a couple days of morning pages and some were just a morning page (singular). I’m doing my artist date right now. I’m sitting at an outdoor patio of a restaurant/pub in a strip mall. I was out running errands and decided to eat at a place I haven’t been to before. Not the ideal location, but we sometimes have to forage for what we need. There’s live music here. A duet of guitars and vocals singing Brown Eyed Girl. The sun is setting and I’m looking up at the mountains where I live and I am admiring them from a different angle. A different perspective. I’m finding beauty here with the silhouette of palm fronds against an orange sky. I found good music and good food. It is quiet in the summer evening. I found what I needed in an unlikely place.
That sounds a lot like the Back Abbey in Upland, but I am glad you have a great evening.